My fiancee and I are getting married April 28th. Everything is basically good to go only problem is our families are TOTALLY different. Not so much my dads side but my mothers (they are divorced an can’t stand each other for this reason). My moms side of the family is very rich and a lot of the time tend to have a snobby attitude when it comes to people. My soon to be wifes family are the type that if you come around like that they have no problem telling you to “get that stick out your ***”.Don’t get me wrong they are very sweet and loving as can be but tend to come off strong. My mom already kind of mad a impression with my fiancees’ family when she met her brother and started questioning about all his tattoos. Then said “oh God, how could you do that to your body. (Turns to me) I hope you don’t plan on doing that”.I’ve talked to my dad about it and he thinks its funny. He says meeting her family will put my mom in place (my dad knows they aren’t bad people but he’s also been around them long enough to know the problems that could come about. He accually took the time to know them when we first met in high school).
My mom has no problem with my fiancee she says she lovely. Not a huge fan of her eyebrow piercing but nothing truly to complain about. But she has all to say about the family just by meeting her brother.
I know this may sound petty but we just want this day to go as smoothly as possible.
Advice is greatly appreciated!
-Hoping for Wedding Day Bliss
Dear Hoping for Wedding Day Bliss,
Weddings are emotional and unfortunately sometimes can create waves. You love your fiancee and you want to spend the rest of your life with this person- at the end of the day that is all that matters. Your mom is being judgemental, whatever the reason she believes anything outside her social norm isn’t ok. You need to talk with your mother privately. Be open and honest about your feelings- “I want this day to be special and pleasant for everyone. This would mean a lot to me if you would attend and support us. I know that you don’t necessarily agree but these people are good people. I am your child, you raised me well and I wouldn’t be marrying this person and being a part of this family unless I knew this was right for me. I hope that you can be open to getting to know them.” She might try, she might not, but this way you’ve set the tone and cleared the air but also have opened the door for her to do what is best for you both.