My partner has a secret foot fetish?

My partner has a secret foot fetish? I’ve seen the internet history. He visits about ten different sites a day. I have no problem with this as I’m pretty open to new things but I’m just confused as to why he won’t open up to me about it?
He is also uninterested in sex. We are trying to get pregnant but he’ll only have sex with me 3-4 times a month around my ovulation days. Other than that he always tells me how tired he is. I want it every day and I always let him know that I do. He rarely masturbates either maybe once a week, if that. How do I get him to open up to me? I get weekly pedicures and wear cute shoes so I don’t see what the problem is?

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In my opinion if you aren’t harming anyone else and you can be open with your partner all is not lost. Maybe to some degree he is scared that you will judge him for liking something off the beaten path. I would definitely spruce up your feet and then tell him that you accept his fetish. Have you tried talking to him about it in a non-confrontational manner? As for the lack of sex, if you are attempting to get pregnant that can add stress to the mix as well. He might feel like he has to be on point only for those specific times. If you can just let things roll and don’t focus so much what the ultimate goal is you ‘ll have a better chance of getting pregnant and he won’t feel so on the spot. Also, another might be that his testosterone levels are low, this can easily be determined with a simple blood test.

*If you are interested in submitting a topic or you have a question please email me at honestgoodadvice@gmail.com

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How to Tell My Spouse that I have a Love Child

Do I tell my wife about my Love Child? My marriage of 18 years hit a several year rough spell.  I began to date a younger person who I told my wife about.  My wife and I through communication reconciled and began a great new chapter in our life.  After I ended the affair I was told by my former girlfriend that she was pregnant.  I told my wife she was pregnant and with my wifes knowledge I took my ex-girlfriend to get an abortion.  When discussing the pregnancy initially my wife told me she couldn’t stay married to me if she had the child.  Who can blame her!!!.  Just my horrible luck in life the abortion did not work and I recently learned she is still pregnant with a healthy baby and she is having it.  She allowed me to speak with her doctors because I questioned the “failed” abortion.  The doctor confirmed the failed abortion and told me the due date which is consistent with the first pregnancy.  Now – what do I do with my wife and family.  Do I tell my wife and children or just my wife.  I can not live keeping this secret from my wife and I am totally unsure as to how she will deal with this.  Please offer advice

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It’s good that you wish to divulge the truth to your wife, she deserves that respect. I would first discuss this with your wife and explain that the abortion did fail and that she is more than welcome to discuss the details with the doctor. No sense in letting your children know until your wife and you decide how to handle the outcome.The best thing you can do is be upfront and honest and also take care of your children. It’s a responsibility that was brought into this world on your own accord. You cannot choose to ignore it. Either way be upfront it will work out the way it is meant to work out in the end.

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An Absent Father

My husband and I used to do all kinds of things together and not just go out and have fun we used to just sit and talk but lately every time I say hey do u wanna spend some us time after work he says yes but as soon as he gets home he either calls his friends gets on the internet or goes somewhere and after he makes plans he says oh u wanted to spend us time i forgot and asks me if I want him to cancel his plans and I always say no cause I don’t want his friends to think I’m not letting him hang with them cause I used to say that and then they started calling me a ***** and saying I don’t let him do anything im also 33 weeks pregnant and the only time we ever cuddle is when he tries to have sex with me and im not supposed to be having sex right now cause my doctor said not too and he tries like everyday but when I say no he just cuddles for like 3 min more then roles over and ignores me till he or I falls asleep I feel like he’s avoiding me or something I just feel like he doesn’t want me anymore I try to talk to him but he always gets upset or mad cause he says im just having a pregnancy mood swing when really I’ve felt like he is gonna leave me as soon our kid is born or something I don’t know what to do im so scared every time I try to have us time he says its boring and wants to go to a friends please someone help I don’t know what to do and just today he usually calls me on his work breaks but when I asked him if he wanted me to call he said no its pointless there’s only 5 min left he used to call even if he had less than a minute just to say he loved me what is going on with him is he avoiding me

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I would sit down and have a serious discussion with your husband and ask him what he wants out of this relationship. Your needs are not being met, and yes you could be hormonal but that is part of pregnancy and he should be supportive and respectful of that. You deserve and are worthy of his time just as much as his friends are. He needs to get his priorities in order a kid is a lifetime commitment. If he tells you that hanging out with you is boring ask him what he would prefer to do, go to a movie, go out to dinner? The point is that this a beautiful process and he is really missing out. He either wants to be a part or he doesn’t. I would ask him his thoughts about the baby and the new change that will becoming when he/she arrives. You both need to be on the same page and it sounds like his heart isn’t in it.

*If you have a question or would like to submit  topic please email me at honestgoodadvice@gmail.com

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Should I Give the Father of My Unborn Baby a Chance ?

I’m 19 weeks pregnant, been together 5 years and it’s been a volatile relationship. I had made up my mind to leave at new year. but on new years eve I discovered im pregnant. I never thought I could get pregnant as I tried for 8 years with my ex husband and then me and my partner never used any protection for 5 years. the doctor told me i would need IVF or treatment to have kids. So I’m happy but feeling nervous that my relationship isn’t 100% reliable. my partner has a temper sometimes and brings up the past when he has a drink. he can be jealous and paranoid about the most innocent things.

We spent the Easter weekend seeing family and I was happy. once again he caused tension and thought I was talking about him and said I had humiliated him over something trivial. I cried all evening, my family have had enough of him and on top of that I’m so aware that I can’t get stressed otherwise I might harm my baby.

Then last night I could sense he was going to have a go at me, he had had a beer and started moaning about my family. i started crying and told him i cant handle the way he is and a baby. i left and went to my aunt’s house. I do love him otherwise I wouldn’t have stayed 5 years. we do have some great times, we share so many passions and after all these years we still have an extremely passionate relationship.

I’m just fed up of his behaviour towards me, his jealousy and lack of trust in me. We can be having a great day but then he will just flip.

What do I suggest to make this work? What do I do? Should I try for the baby? All I’ve ever wanted was a family but I’m so gutted that now I have my miracle baby I don’t have a good partner to share these times with. It’s so sad. I sometimes wonder why this baby was sent to me now, when it seems like my relationship is so difficult.

Would counselling work? What should I do? should I give him one last chance or do this on my own now? It also breaks my heart that if i leave he will go on to meet other women, its so hard to know what to do!

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Congrats for your little blessing. A baby is a huge responsibility and it sounds like your partner can’t take care of himself let alone you right now. If you were planning on leaving in the first place it’s because it’s the best decision for you and your safety. I think a parent should be involved in their child’s life but that doesn’t mean that the parents have to be together if there is no future between the two of them. I would separate from him and tell him that you have a responsibility to this unborn child and it’s overall well-being. That you want him to be a part of the baby’s life but only if he is able to commit to a clean/sober life. Counseling is a great option. If you still want to make this work for the two of you (not just the baby) then great. If it’s just for the baby you are just prolonging the inevitable. Sometimes when people are given a choice and realize they have a responsibility they do shape up. But this is up to him you will have no control over his actions. In asking him to seek help and take care of himself isn’t being unfair or asking too much. You have the child’s best interest at heart. Since you have family members who have seen this behavior they can vouch for you. It will be shaky but you’ve wanted a baby for so long and it’s here now- how you choose to proceed is up to you.

 

*If you have a question or would like to submit a topic please email me at honestgoodadvice@gmail.com

 

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Will He Leave Me Because I’m Pregnant?

My husband has been married twice and has had 4 children and we just got married in october now me and him are expecting a child and I’m worried he’s gonna leave me too. I know he probably won’t but I’m scared he’s going to. I’m afraid to talk to him about it. We both really love each other but I’m just afraid to talk to him. Should I talk to him about it ?

-Worried Mom-to-be

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Dear Worried,

I would first want to know if you have any insight into why he left his last two marriages. It might have nothing to do with the fact there were children involved but more so that the relationships themselves fell apart. If you already know the back story for his previous two marriages and it has nothing to do with the children then you should be fine. Does he seem excited and happy that you are both expecting? If you don’t have the story on his failed marriages you should ask. It’s important to learn from one anothers mistakes as well as know how the other person learned and maybe did not learn from those experiences. If you know each others weakness you will better understand how to work together and through lifes changes. Could it also be possible that hormones are getting the best of you right now and you overthinking the matter? This could be contributing to your uncertainty as well.

 

*If you have a question or topic please email me at honestgoodadvice@gmail.com

 

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Wife Won’t Stop Complaining About My Ex

My wife won’t stop and it’s making me crazy? She won’t stop Complaining about my ex!
We’ll call my wife becky and call my ex Krissie

Here are the cliff notes:

Krissie and I broke up

I met Becky and we got married a couple weeks later

Krissie found out she pregnant and told me

my wife and mother said she was a liar just trying to get me back

Krissie came with an ultrasound and note from her doctor estimating conception

I was an idiot and denied my son which I’ll always regret because I missed out on his first years and will never get that back. I was afraid of ruining my marriage.

Everyone in my wife’s family kept telling her to demand a paternity test

We got one. Yeah he’s my kid. Krissie hated me for implying otherwise but forgave me for the sake of our son. she has allowed me to be part of his life, I see him almost everyday now, and she even decided not to sue for back child support since I am now providing financially & emotionally.

The problem is my wife hates my ex. It’s like she can’t stop herself from complaining about krissie. according to my brother krissie is a dream ex… he has 4 kids from 4 moms so I guess he knows

Krissie only calls me if it concerns our son (serious stuff, not “just to talk”)

Every time I go to pick him up he is clean and happy, and she doesn’t say bad things about me to him (he’s a kid who repeats what he hears , which is why Krissie won’t let becky be around him anymore because the first time she met him she called his mom a lot of bad things, and I agreed my wife doesn’t need to be in his life, when she’s acting that way)

She doesn’t sleep around so I don’t have to worry about creeps being around my kid and she’s just a great mom to him . I love my wife and I want our marriage to work but it’s becoming to much to handle. We argue everyday, she says I want Kris back, she says Kris wants me, and she implies that my son isn’t mine even though we had the tests and he looks exactly like me.

I just need to know how I can get her to understand that I just want to be a good father. I hate myself for denying him for so long. I never thought i’d be one of those dead beats. Sometime i want to cry thinking about all the things I missed.Ii don’t blame my wife because i am a grown man and made my own decisions, but I felt so much pressure from her and my mother, saying that there was no way she just found out about the pregnancy right after i got married. the truth is part of me knew the truth, I guess I was a coward so I don’t need people telling me what scum I am, because I already know, I just want to have a good life and be and good dad. what can I do to reassure my wife that the extent of my relationship with Kris is that we love our son and that’s it.

-Loving Father at Wits End

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Dear Loving Father,

 

You need to talk with your wife and be just as honest as you have been here. Tell her that you love her and never want to make her feel uncomfortable but you also love your son and have an obligation to be a good father to him. You need to ask her that she respect the mother of your child because the child had no control of being born into this family. It’s not fair nor healthy to the child to hear negative things about his/her own mother. It also makes it difficult for the child to want to bond with your current wife. I would also reccommend you tell your wife that it makes you uncomfortable and it hurts your feelings to see her act this way. If you cannot come to an agreement I would reccomend couples thearpy so you have an outside source who can help you through this. Keep on being a great dad- the child will be grateful later that you stepped up and are apart of his life now.

 

* If you have a question or topic please email me at honestgoodadvice@hotmail.com