I’m 25 years old and a white male who currently lives alone..
I used to like in the city while I was living with my mom and her boyfriend 4 years ago. I was going to school and working fulltime. My mom got into a fight with her bf and I had no choice to but to move with her. while this was all happening..due to my work schedule and school I wasn’t doing anything besides that, I became depressed. I was never eating right or sleeping right with my crazy hectic work schedule. my mom moved away with me from her bf into the farms where there is NOTHING..no jobs NOTHING. So while I was there my depression was still bad and we thought the best bet was to get social security until I can find a job. my depression was turning into social anxiety and that’s what I have they say. My mom started losing her mind, and doing all these bad things to me…tried ruining all my social relationships with people thru facebook…ruined my relationship with my gf at the time by telling them all that I’m soo crazy in the head just because I was depressed and needed to go on SS for a little… I couldn’t stand her anymore so I had no choice but to move out. little did I know, she withheld mail from me(she could have went to jail) but they where would I have lived), student loan mail and my credit got soo messed up.. I had to pay back 9 months worth of big loan payments just to get it rehibilitated..thank god my friend took my in his apt. I had to pay rent to him and pay money for food all with a little SS check. I got by somehow but barely. Then he moved again and I couldn’t get a job because I have no car or money and I need to get the rent money up and a part-time job wouldn’t do it…so my friend who took me in decided to move to another state so I found another place in the city..I’m still getting a SS check but ‘ enough for rent where I’m living now(a basement) and food. I have no savings and I want to get a job and am scared to get off SS because I need to get the money up every month and a part-time job wont be enough alone. I don’t want to work and still be on it because that still will get me nowhere. I have anxiety so an over night job is what I’ve been looking for but I can’t find anything.. what should I do in my situation? im losing friends and ppl think I just want to be a bum and I cant stand it.. so yea I’ve been moving around from couch to couch for the past 2 years trying to settle down but I’m so confused as what to do since my mom screwed me over I have NO family.. I’m all alone. What should I do?thank you for reading…means alot i jsut dont know who to talk to…

I am not sure what state you reside in but there are many that offer free counseling services. You would probably have to do a little digging. But you could also go to your local library and ask for help on how to find this information. I would definitely recommend going to see someone. It might be simple therapy and/or they might recommend drugs for a period of time. If you are able I would recommend walking or jogging- something that involves exercise. When we are anxious a lot of chemicals are released into the brain at once that can cause an overload. The best way to release these chemicals is through physical activities. I would recommend cardio and then something relaxing after such as yoga. The local YMCA should be able to offer these to you for a cheap price once you find a job. In the mean time use a local park or area where you can enjoy the fresh air. As for a job I would start offering your room mates help around the house/apt if you are unable to pay the full amount of rent. Once you start to feel better start interviewing for jobs. I know it’s scary but I am sure you will be able to find something full time that can get you off social security. And jobs are jobs- they come and go. Keep your head up and try and stay positive. Whatever you think will attract the same in return- ie if you think negatively then you will get negative and vice versa. If times are tough it’s because there is a lesson involved. You will pull through just have faith in yourself!
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